irresponsibleeyouth: The trick is to not let people know how really weird you are until it’s too late for them to back out.
friendlycloud: hitlervevo: why the fuck cant we text the police lets say there is a murderer in ur house and you’re hiding behind your sofa and you do have your phone with you but you can’t call the police because the murderer might hear you Relevant
thegirl-inred: toned-tanned-fit-andready: v0nlaust: caliiforniadreaming-xo: gothicstan: localised: do you ever get the urge to get up in the middle of the night while everyone else is fast asleep and just walk places and to be completely alone and entirely dedicated to your thoughts yes but the problem is i dont want to get murdered u feel me i feel you we all feel you why...
callmekitto: internetfeet: People mistake ovulation and menstruation to be the same thing when in fact they aren’t Ovulation is when the eggs are saying “hello friends I am here” And menstuation is when the eggs are saying “goodbye friends I am gone” THIS EXPLAINS THE DIFFERENCE 40x BETTER THAN MY ENTIRE SEVENTH GRADE SEX ED CLASS. I’ve never heard of menstuation
liquiddittyfloats: DO YOU EVER CRY BECAUSE OF THE REALIZATION THAT SINCE MERLIN WAS ALWAYS BEGGING FOR A DAY OFF AND ARTHUR NEVER GAVE HIM ONE, THAT MEANS MERLIN AND ARTHUR SPENT EVERY SINGLE DAY TOGETHER. IN TEN YEARS, THEY NEVER SPENT A SINGLE DAY APART. unless one of them was off almost getting killed. but besides that NOT. A. SINGLE. DAY.
sidnugget: Yesterday was my grandparents 45th anniversary and my grandma was like “if I had killed him 20 years ago I would be out of jail by now” and that basically sums them up
Crying myself to sleep bc I don’t have a flat stomach or big boobs.
soudas: can you even sue the president like what if you tried to sue obama and you just got a letter back saying “no” and he came to your house and did the worm